Aug 1- Sunday.
Feast day of St Alphonsus of the Novena Church.
I had no idea that it was St Alphonsus feast day yesterday. Nagprepare lang talaga ako para magsimba. Pakiramdam ko kase kulang na ang linggo ko kapag hindi ako nakapagsimba sa Novena Church. You know these past few months, I've been thru a lot. Everyday was a struggle. I became very weak.. People were worried, my career was at stake, debts became higher, body's deteriorating and i was totally "out of order".. May mga panahon na gusto mo nang sumuko at manahimik nalang sa isang lugar na kung saan walang nakakakilala sa iyo, yung walang magtatanong, walang manghuhusga, at walang mag aalala sa iyo. Napakaselfish kung iisipin kung sakaling nangyari nga iyon. But, i never did. Instead, I stayed in the battle, laid all my cards, no armours, no weapons and fought alone.
It was a hard encounter. There is no one to turn to. Nothing's left except myself. There was a time when I heard something bad, and this news really broke my heart. I cried, ran away and prayed wholeheartedly.." Lord, Here I am, begging for You, what more can I endure? Why am I still here? suffering? From now on, I will offer my heart to You. And You do the rest. It is upto you whether You want to take it, crash till it becomes numb or let it beat again. All im asking for You now is to save me from this darkness."
I realized that going to mass every Sunday was essential for me. At first, my intention was only to attend the mass, hear the Sunday's Gospel and ask for guidance. But As time passes by, the habit of attending mass, became a pursuit of self sulfillment. It is not only the celebration, but the Good news and the Redemption of myself to Him. Truly that the redemptorist have helped me in their mission.
Now I make it a point that my Sundays are for Him. Totoo pala yung sinasabi nilang nakakauhaw and mga salita Niya and you will really seek for Him. I even tried to apply in their Parish Council as a lector, to take part of my vocation as a Catholic, but my work schedule had a conflict.Nevertheless, I am very much thankful for what He has done for me. He gave me enough strength I needed, the will to live my life again the way He wanted it to be, and above all He thought me how to love again. It was for me to love myself.
Redemptorists use the initials “C.Ss.R.”after their names. These four letters are an abbreviation for Congregatio Sanctissimi Redemptoris, Latin for “Congregation of the Most Holy Redeemer". The Congregation has a motto taken from verse 7 of Psalm 130, in Latin: Copiosa apud eum redemptio (With him there is plentiful redemption). This portion of the psalm is a succinct declaration of the spirit that motivates Redemptorists because in it God shows himself to be absolutely generous in love, mercy and forgiveness for men and women, loving the world so much as to give his only Son, Jesus Christ (cf. John 3,16). Redemptorists have been touched by this love and therefore seek to carry such Good News to the world but with a special preference for those who live on the margin of Church and society.- St Alphonsus
Its' a cliche, that
There's a reason for everything. Its true though. I have made mistakes in the past, been down, took risks and got wrecked. Giving up is is no longer in my vocabulary. My experiences thought me the best lessons in life with no regrets. With God, I am wiser in my decisions now, at times of melancholy, i am tougher, and currently working towards becoming a better one, a better Dawn.
Probably this must be the reason why it all happened..For I am bound to meet Him anywhere else but here! here in Singapore, in the four corners of the Church of St. Alphonsus ( Novena Church ). So as they celebrate their 75th Anniversary, I pray that the Redemptories may continue to share the good news, and spread St Alphonsus' advocacies.
For I have never been this gratified if not from Him. I have found God in my heart. And If God is calling me, I will Go! even if it would have me to leave everything behind.
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Here is a video of Here I Am Lord. It is one of the Church hymns being sang in Novena Church. One of my favorite too during Choir days, when I was still in Circle of Friends Choir in Sanctuario De Santo Cristo.
